Emotions are the feedback our own body gives to events around us. The physiological reactions that occur are based on what has happened to us before. These experiences are influenced by our beliefs and/or thoughts about the world around us, our perceptions, as well as attitudes that make us value and understand a situation in one way or another.
Since our emotional reactions about an issue is an impulsive and instantaneous stimulus, they help us to evaluate what has happened and in this way we realize what it means for us. Therefore, two people can have very different emotions about the same situation.
Types of emotions:
Because each emotion is different, a categorization or list is made to explain them. However, this division cannot be considered 100% definitive because it is impossible to identify the relationships that are created between all emotions.
Primary or basic – These types of emotions are those that occur in response to a stimulus. They are considered alterations in mood that originate from, among other things, a thought, feeling, passion or memory.
When triggered, physiological, psychosomatic and psychological variations are created. The magnitude of these responses changes according to personality, physical and/or emotional state and stimulus.
It is important to remember that there are 4 basic emotions: fear, anger, joy/happiness and sadness.
They come consecutively. A clear example of this is when the primary emotion appears as ‘fear’ and then the secondary emotion as ‘anger’. Note that secondary emotions are produced by social norms or moral standards.
Positive – A positive emotion can also be defined as healthy. This is because they have a good impact on a person’s well-being, making them feel happy.
Negatives – Obviously, these are the opposite of the previous ones. Consequently, individuals feel sad or scared. These types of emotions are also known as toxic. Although, to some extent, we all experience negative emotions in our lives, if they are low in intensity, they can actually be good for us, as this is how we learn to improve our actions and behaviors in the future.
Ambiguous – Ambiguous or neutral emotions are those that do not cause either positive or negative emotions to occur. Emotion in the form of surprise is an example, because at the moment of occurrence, we feel neither good nor bad.
Static – It is painting, music and art in general that cause static emotions. When we listen to a song, we may feel sad or happy, but this feeling is different from the happiness or sadness experienced previously at other times in our lives because these emotions are part of an artistic moment.
Social – To arouse these emotions, there must always be a person in front of us. Examples are the admiration, shame or gratitude we feel for someone.
Instrumental – This type of emotion occurs when we want to achieve a goal and has the objective to manipulate in some way. This type of emotion is hard to recognize because people can seem very natural.
The importance of managing emotions:
Absolutely all people need a management skill. Emotional reactions are necessary to adapt to the world around us and when we are able to manage our emotions, things change for the better, we become happier and more successful.
Each person is only capable of withstanding a certain level of emotional stress. When overwhelmed, almost everyone starts to misbehave, and this shows in others around us. Prolonged emotional stress also leads to psychosomatic disorders.
In a team, it is particularly valuable to understand the emotions and feelings of our colleagues and friends. Any group in society, even a family, periodically gets into a state caused by different emotional states, motivation and opposing interests of its members. Managing emotions in conflict offers a chance not only to resolve the outbreak of a dispute, but also to eliminate the conflict from the very beginning.
Below are 4 simple steps to start managing your emotions effectively:
- Awareness
If you’re not aware of when you’re overly emotional or why you react impulsively, how can you try to manage your emotions? It’s impossible. Start to monitor your emotions and give them a “name”. Sometimes we find it hard to identify what we’re feeling, and giving ourselves a ‘name’ helps us to get clarity, which is essential for moving forward.
- Discover the “Why” of your emotions
Once you’ve identified how you’re feeling, you want to uncover why. What is causing that feeling inside you? Of course, there could be a million reasons, and to find out, you need to ask yourself, as you would with a friend, “What’s wrong? What makes me feel like this?”. Your mind will always be searching for an answer.
More often than not, it’s simply the way you think about a situation that causes you to act the way you feel. Another huge reason why we perceive negative emotions is because our values are not present in that moment or being respected.
- Ask yourself, what is the solution?
Once you’ve discovered why, ask yourself what could you do to take control? Sometimes you may need to change the way you think about a situation.
As you can see, your thoughts lead directly to your feelings, so if you’re feeling bad, you most likely have a negative thought that’s making you feel that way. If you start analyzing what other possible ways of looking at the situation there are, you’ll start to feel much better immediately.
Sometimes, by simply understanding the underlying reason, your emotions will start to subside, because understanding always leads to calming.
- Choose how you want to react
This is the hardest part. How we react and manage our emotions is a habit. Haven’t you noticed those people who stress themselves out all the time, even when it’s not the case? You almost pity them. They have gotten into the habit of associating a situation they don’t like with “freaking out”. Their emotions have hijacked them.
Learning to listen to your emotions, identify them, understand them and then choose them is an ongoing effort and it takes a lot of discipline to begin to build this essential skill.
Being an emotional person is not bad if you experience positive emotions. But if you feel anger, fear, discouragement and you can’t get rid of them, change. Negative emotions are detrimental to your mental and physical health. Do exercises, read helpful books, participate in workouts and you will surely succeed! Try it, because it’s easier to do than it seems at first sight. ?
